If you need someone to blame, better not look in the mirror

Whatever happened to personal accountability?

You know, taking responsibility for your actions, admitting when you’re at fault, refusing to shift the blame to someone else.

It seems to be a forgotten art form in this country, similar to blacksmithing. In fact, if accountability were a breed of animal, it would be on the endangered species list. If it were an automobile, it would be a Pacer.

For a recent, well-publicized example of this problem, one need look no further than the New York lawsuit seeking damages against McDonald’s Corporation for making its teenage customers fat.

In the latest round, a federal judge last week dismissed the lawsuit for failure to state a valid legal claim, though he also left the door ajar for the plaintiffs to amend and refile their complaint.

The lawsuit was initiated on behalf of two teenagers who claimed to eat a significant number of their weekly meals at McDonald's, almost always choosing to "supersize" them. Ashley Pelman, 14, of the Bronx, is 4-foot-10 and weighs nearly 200 pounds. Jazlyn Bradley, 19, of Brooklyn, is 5-foot-6 and weighs close to 300 pounds. The plaintiffs’ attorneys were hoping to convert their case into a class action lawsuit representing obese teens across the country.

Can you say, "Cha-ching!" Not if your name is Ronald McDonald.

Anyway, the plaintiffs accused the fast-food giant of deceiving consumers about the high levels of fat, sugar, salt and cholesterol in its products. However, Judge Robert W. Sweet found there was no evidence McDonald's had concealed information about its ingredients. More importantly, he ruled that fast food, and McDonald's products in particular (Say "Ouch!" if you are a McDonald’s executive), are widely known to contain high levels of potentially harmful ingredients.

Really? I guess that explains why doctors and dietitians never came out with the "Fast Food Diet."

According to Judge Sweet (there’s a little irony in that name, isn’t there?), "If a person knows or should know that eating copious orders of supersized McDonald's products is unhealthy and may result in weight gain, it is not the place of the law to protect them from their own excesses."

Yet, he also made time to ridicule products such as chicken McNuggets. Although consumers may believe they are pan-fried white meat, the Judge found them to be "a McFrankenstein creation of various elements not utilized by the home cook." Yes, but at least they have a shelf-life of a couple thousand years.

Ultimately, Judge Sweet decided that "nobody is forced to eat at McDonald's." Of course, the Judge has never been in a car with my kids around noon on a Saturday.

Still, the real problem here is with the parents of these obese teens. Instead of admitting their failures as parents, they look to blame someone else. Particularly someone with "deep pockets."

No accountability.

Let me tell you something, if you are too stupid to figure out that allowing your child to eat more than half their meals at McDonald’s is akin to painting their bedroom with three coats of lead paint and making them wear asbestos underwear, then the only lawsuit you should be involved in is the one you file to try and win custody back from social services.

But in America these days, we are no longer required to accept responsibility for our mistakes. Remember the woman -- Stella Liebeck -- who sued McDonald’s for damages (and won) after spilling hot coffee on her lap?

How about all the corporate execs who take the Fifth rather than admit their wrongdoing? Wouldn't want to risk losing their second homes in Aspen. Meanwhile, their employees lose their jobs and their shareholders lose their investments.

Or what about Bobby Knight? Just when you thought his long-overdue dismissal might finally teach him a lesson, numerous schools rushed in to bid for his services, each willing to broom his "excesses" under the rug. Heck, he’s even filed a lawsuit against Indiana University for having the gall to dismiss him in the first place. All he did was physically assault a student heckler. Obviously, the kid deserved it.

According to King Bobby, his dismissal is a symptom of a bigger ill in our current society: The younger generation is allowed to get away with way too much.

There’s just no accountability anymore.

Copyright 2003 Marc L. Prey
All rights reserved.

Philosophy 101

I am a firm believer in the old adage, “What goes around, comes around.” Some people may phrase it as, “You reap what you sow.” Still others may advise, “You get what you deserve.”

Each of these is a way of saying, in effect: If you do a good deed, you will benefit from the good deed of another. Maybe not today or tomorrow, but at some point during your life. Or, perhaps, once you arrive in the Great Hereafter -- assuming that is your final destination.

I also believe the converse is true. Thus, if you perform a bad deed, then…well, you get the idea.

I suppose you could liken this to the philosophy of good and bad karma. According to Buddhist teachings, karma is the force generated by a person’s actions and determines the nature of that person’s next existence. Create bad karma, and you may return to earth as an earthworm.

Now, some people may dismiss these events as mere coincidence, but even if they happen to be correct, the world would undoubtedly be a better place if everyone went about their business as if this principle were the law.

I have tried to instill a little of this philosophy in my sons, but it’s a difficult concept to grasp for a generation that is accustomed to instant gratification. After all, if we left the restaurant selection up to my kids, we’d only eat at establishments that included the words “fast” and “food” in their unofficial titles.

Still, I can’t help but try.

For instance, the other day my younger son came to me complaining that his older brother was picking on him.

“Have I ever told you about something called, ‘What goes around, comes around’?”

He gave me a look that said, “Oh, no, not another one of Dad’s goofy lessons. Why did I open my mouth…”

Unfazed, I continued: “What that means is, if you do something bad to someone, eventually something bad will happen to you. It has to do with something called ‘karma.’”

“Is that one of those new cars down at the auto show?’

“No, it’s a philosophy about--“

“A philoso-what?”

“Okay, look at it like this: Your brother picks on you, which is a bad thing -- right?”

Vigorous nodding.

“Well, someday someone bigger is going to pick on him, and he’ll learn what it feels like. Then, maybe he won’t pick on you again.”

“Cool. When is that gonna happen?”

“I don’t know. It may not happen for a while, but it will happen. That’s what it means when I say, ‘What goes around, comes around.’”

He pondered this lesson a moment, then said, “Can’t you just take away his Nintendo and send him to his room?”

So, maybe he’s a little too young for a lesson in philoso-what, but someday he will understand what I am getting at.

After all, practical examples of this belief-system appear all around us. Just the other day I came across the following story:

B.J. Lundin, 20, of Poolville, Texas, was tailgating the car of Stephen Thomas Manley Jr. The latter tapped his brakes to send a message to Lundin to back off. All this did was send Lundin into a rage. He eventually pulled around Manley, then screeched to a halt -- blocking Manley's car. Lundin proceeded to jump out of his car and, seeing that Manley had his windows rolled up and his doors locked, started throwing rocks at Manley’s car. Deep in a blind rage, Lundin was kicking and hitting Manley's car when another motorist drove by and accidentally ran him over. Lundin was pronounced dead at the scene.

One might surmise that Mr. Lundin was not a believer in the adage, “What goes around, comes around.” But maybe he will change his mind when, in the next life, he looks in the mirror and sees an earthworm staring back.

Copyright 2003 Marc L. Prey
All rights reserved.